My World by Choice of Heart
by Dendey
Summary: AU. Harry escapes into another dimension and lives there. Rated M for character death and violent scenes. Will be SLASH in later chapters, probably hpss
1. First Memories

Disclaimer: Not mine, as we all know that all of the people out of the HP-universe belong to Joanne Kathleen Rowling. I'm just using them for my evil plots and twist their characters as much as I want to, because I need the people to fit into this story. Some of the characters will definitely be OOC, because as I mention in the Authors Note HBP will be nearly totally ignored, so Snape won't be too bad. And IMPORTANT! This will be AU! So, if you don't like time traveling or inter dimensional traveling you really shouldn't read my story. In addition to that you really shouldn't read my story if you do **NOT** like slash, because this WILL turn out to be slash. So, now that you've been warned...I should mention the violence and character death in this story. (That's the main reason for to rate it M.) There are some people that will definitely die in this story and there are even some that will survive. (A really intelligent move of mine isn't it? No? There wouldn't be any story without living people? Haha! That's what you think, guys, that's what you think...)

A/N: Glaringly obvious ignoring HBP, but not OoTP. I'm not sure if I'll work some elements of HBP into it, but I might as not everything within the book is bad or like I use to put it in-useable. XD! Please try to bear with me and my unbearably bad grammar, but I have yet to find a beta for my stories (anyone volunteering? You'd be gladly accepted, believe me!) and as English isn't my native language I am bound to make mistakes. Now, that you know what's coming your way, I really hope there's someone left who'll continue reading this...If that's the case, I'm sure you'll hate the word flashback by the end of this! evil grin!

**PROLOG**

A sharp pain in his right shoulder was the last thing he felt before falling into complete nothingness.

Slowly opening his eyes Harry found himself lying in a comfortable bed, but with unknown surroundings. It looked vaguely familiar, but he couldn't place where he might've seen such a room before. The walls were white, so were the sheets, the closed hangings presumeably hiding the window and the door. It wasn't the Hogwarts infirmary, he'd spent enough time there to at least know how it looked like, besides this was a single room, with just his bed and no Madam Pomfrey in sight.

The door creaked open and a young healer around her twenties stepped in.

"Aah! You're awake! Finally. We've all been really worried about you." She confessed and stepped closer to the bed.

Harry regarded her with caution, he had learned not to trust people at first, but he got the impression that she was okay.

"I am Healer Jones, but you can call me Anita if you want to." She tried to reassure him, probably he seemed scared to her, because he had automatically moved to the edge of the bed furthest away from the door when she'd entered.

Harry decided that he just wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone, so he just went back under the covers. Strangely enough Healer Jones seemed to get the message, for she left the room in silence. Five minutes later she pocked her head back into the room, just to hear her patients even breaths. With a sad smile tugging at the corner of her lips she went back to her duties, checking up on the other patients of St. Mungo's.

The next time Harry opened his eyes it was darker in the room than it had been last time he awoke. He wasn't really sure if it was possible, but when he stood up to look out of the window, he could just barely make out a very slim moon surrounded by the stars, apparently it had been the new moon just two nights ago. He wondered shortly just why he couldn't reach the windowsill with his hips, but had to carry a chair over to pull himself up onto it, but then he let himself be engulfed by the beautiful and silent night.

XXX**FLASHBACK**XXX

"_HARRY!" Ginny screamed with her hand outstretched to reach for him, but she was so far away, lying on the ground in the middle of the street, just outside of the Three Broomsticks, held down by three Death Eaters, twenty feet in front of him. Instinctively Harry wanted to race towards her and hex the Death Eaters and the looming figure of Voldemort behind her, but a firm hand pulled his wrist back, while an arm reached around his torso, pulling him back against the lean form of his potions master. The second their emergency portkey activated he saw a green light engulf her body, while the life faded out of her eyes. _

XXX**FLASHBACK END**XXX

It was true, Snape had saved his life that day, but the price had been too high. Ginny had died along with twenty-seven other visitors in Hogsmead that day. Seven students, three aurors and eighteen witches and wizards simply shopping for Christmas presents and trying to enjoy themselves. Harry snapped out of his trance when he felt the hot tears running out of his eyes and down his cheeks. They didn't seem to cool his body off, but more like they wanted to set him on fire and he nearly panicked when another memory rushed into his mind.

XXX**FLASHBACK**XXX

_Hot flames shot out of his opponents wand and Harry dodged them, rolling aside and out of reach of the Death Eater sending fire at him. He bumped into someone lying on the ground, the robes told Harry enough to tell that it was a fellow Gryffindor sixth-year, he pulled him around while checking his pulse. While looking into Ron's unmoving face Harry realized that there was no pulse, but a whole was burned into his chest right where his best friends heart had once been._

XXX**FLASHBACK END**XXX

Harry jumped up from the windowsill and ran over to the bed in which he had awoken, he scooted under the covers and tried to hide in the comforting warmth of the bed, but it didn't help as the color of the moonlit covers reminded him of something else.

XXX**FLASHBACK**XXX

_The full moon was shining down upon her dress and Hermione looked stunningly beautiful. It was their graduation night, but her and Viktor just couldn't wait a second longer. Harry felt him twitch at his side, leaning his weight from one foot onto the other, tapping impatiently with his right foot when he wasn't brushing down his traditionally charcoal dress robes. They had decided to mix their cultures so Hermione walked down the aisle in an innocent white dress robe. Her father led her to his soon-to-be-son-in-law and gave him a hard look. Viktor answered with a determined step forward, a challenging expression upon his face and determination shining in his eyes. Yes, he would protect Hermione until the end and that was exactly what he did after Harry, as their best men, presented their rings. Just when he slid her ring over Hermiones finger a green light rushed up to them, but missed them by mere inches, killing their priest instead. The Death Eaters rushed into the little crowd and soon cursed were thrown and answered on either side. Harry had just stunned another Death Eater when he heard Hermione scream, for a Death Eater had put her under the cruciatus curse. Luna, her maid of honor, stunned him from behind, freeing her from the curse, but in that little moment of unawareness another Death Eater shot the killing curse at her. Luna died with a relieved smile upon her face, her laugher dying in her eyes as her body went limp and fell to the ground while Hermione got up from it. Harry's anger reached another intensity and he battled himself through the crowd to get to Hermione. He saw the tears running down her cheeks long before he heard her cries of despair. She was clutching Luna's limp form to her chest as if she could revive her by sheer force of will, but in the end she just joined her for a Death Eater had sneaked up on her from behind and plunged a poisoned dagger through her ribcage. She died in the hospital wing, in his arm, her white dress robe covered in blood and dirt, her left hand entwined with Viktors right one. He died the same night, not even an hour later. He'd been hit by the cruciatus curse multiple times, his body had been a mess because his tormentors had liked to use a cutting curses on him. He had lost too much blood and his mental strength had faded into nothingness the moment Hermiones chest went down for the last time._

XXX**FLASHBACK END**XXX

He cried harder and harder, so he didn't even notice that someone had stepped inside the room. But when he was swept up into a pair of arms, supporting his weight, rocking him and rubbing his back, he did notice. A voice started talking to him, a soft voice, a young voice, not older then ten or so, soothing him, telling him it would all work out in the end and he so wanted to believe this voice, that he gave in to it and cried out all of his grief. He didn't need to tell this voice what he was crying for, whom he was mourning, but he was still understood. At least he felt as if he was, somehow, strangely enough, understood, cared for and accepted for being weak. It was a stunningly good feeling to know that someone accepted it that he, the-boy-who-lived, was just a boy with a lot to comprehend and even more to mourn, grief, miss and yearn for. He wanted nothing more than to end all of this madness, but knew he wasn't strong enough to kill Voldemort in the end. In the long run he was afraid to loose, because he knew there was nothing left the Dark Lord knew not, for he had taken all the love out of his life.

Voldemort had killed his parents, his godfather, his two best friends, his girlfriend, classmates, the nearly-husband of one of his best friends and so many more he had never known. He was close, he knew it, close to the point where he would break, where the light would succumb to darkness, something that was not allowed to happen, but apparently couldn't be avoided. After crying himself to sleep he dreamed for the first time in years of a life without Voldemort, without Death Eaters and without people dying because of him.


	2. First Words

Disclaimer: Not mine. (For the whole thingy please check the prologue!)

A/N: Wow...it's been quite a while since I've updated this one...but rest assured without Sylkie's prodding I surely wouldn't be uploading this today! It's been written for quite some time now, but I lacked the incentive to put it up. I do hope that it won't take as long to recollect it again next time...but I can not promise! So if you feel that the next chapter should be up next year, you might want to remind me of that in ten months!

**CHAPTER ONE:**

The light of dawn woke him up the next day, to find another weight lying beside him. Harry carefully craned his neck around, to see a mess of long black hair. He didn't remember his hair ever being so long, but as it was attached to his head and hurt when he pulled at it, it was apparently his own. There was another puddle of black hair, he guessed it would reach down onto the shoulders of it's owner, but couldn't be sure. Then he began to study the facial features of his comforter.

He looked like a sweet innocent child, like a nine-year-old should look like. Harry had no idea why he knew that the boy was nine years old, but he was sure about it. 'Strange...' he thought, 'I don't even know his name, yet I feel safe enough to trust him...with my whole heart.' This thought scared Harry nearly out of his mind, so it wasn't in the least surprising that he rapidly jumped out of the bed and searched for an escape route, like Remus had taught him in his third year. He ran to the window, but it seemed as if he was in the fifth level of the building, not a height to jump down without aid. So he sharply turned around and discovered a second door in the room, he quickly, but silently made his way to it and discovered it to be a bathroom.

In the middle of his morning routine he suddenly stopped and shyly looked into the mirror attached to the wall over the sink. What he saw made his heart stop and continue it's beat trice as fast as before. There, in the mirror, fearful green eyes stared back at him...no...her! In the mirror there was a little girl, she looked to be maybe six or seven, but not a day older. It was confusing for Harry to see a younger and most of all female reflection of himself. 'What the hell is going on here?' he asked himself, but no answer his mind conjured up seemed to fit. 'Maybe it's a window!', that was his last hope, so he reached out with his right hand and saw the little girl reaching out with her left. His hand touched the hand of the little girl, but he could feel the cold glass surface underneath his palm. 'I'm a girl?' he thought bewildered. He checked. And to his astonishment he found he could verify that statement. 'How old am I?' He thought wryly. 'I can't be older than six, okay seven at the most...no...I know...I'm eight...and my birthday it's the...25th of August...strange...it changed.' A new thought struck him and Harry went limp. He sank down to the floor and stared into space. '...I was given a new life...a new chance at life...maybe I can try again?...Maybe, just maybe I can make it all right this time?' He vowed to himself that he would accept his new fate and that he would try to prove to the fates, that he deserved this second chance, that he was strong enough to succeed against Voldemort and carry out the prophecy.

Silently sliding back through the door and into the room in which he'd woken, he found azure eyes locking onto his own green ones and couldn't keep the gasp that fell from his lips contained as recognition hit him. Sirius Black. The young boy who had comforted him the night before was his godfather! He quickly looked away and was halfway hidden behind the door to the bathroom, when he dared to look at the boy in his bed a second time, just to make sure that his imagination wasn't playing any tricks on him.

Sirius meanwhile must have taken his gasp, followed by his hiding as shyness, for he slowly lowered his form onto the ground to calmly make his way over to him. He made no sudden movement and Harry had the strange feeling that his godfather was afraid of frightening him, just like he'd been so many years ago in that little shadowed spot between a garage and a hedge where he'd first seen the grim staring into his green eyes with his fluorescent gaze.

"I didn't mean to startle you and I'm sorry if I did...I just couldn't bear to hear you cry anymore.", Sirius silently explained his behaviour of the past night, once he'd stopped to stand in front of Harry.

Looking up into these trusting and familiar eyes Harry noted a sadness that he knew all too well...he just wondered who it had been...who had died to put such sadness into his godfathers eyes?

"Thanks...I'm sorry.", was all he could think of at the moment. Thanks for staying with him and thanks for comforting him, but most of all, I'm sorry that you lost someone so close to your heart.

"It's okay...I'm okay, if you are.", Sirius whispered back with a strange look in his eyes Harry had never seen before. Why was it so important that he was okay anyway? Of course his godfather had been one of the few that had truly cared about him and his wellbeing, whereas most had only focused their gazes onto the saviour of the wizarding world, the weapon of the light, absolutely disregarding the boy behind, the fragil soul that was rattling at the case society had forced him into and screaming to be freed!

"Why?", Harry asked confused and was startled by the soft embrace in wich he was engulfed. It felt so good, so warm and comforting...and caring.

"Because your as hurt and sad as I am. They say you lost your parents...I can't imagine what that's like...I only lost my little brother...but it's bad enough already...I can not fathom it to possibly ever be worse than it is now.", he admitted softly into the black, slightly messy locks of the girl in his arms.

'..little brother? Regulus is dead? So he can't ever join the Death Eaters!', Harry thought that it was good that Sirius brother was dead, even though he felt very bad for thinking like that, but less Death Eaters meant less victims and that was a good thing, now wasn't it?


End file.
